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Another snarky crapometer

Miss Snark is running another crapometer. This time round people send in their hook (up to 250 words). Miss Snark is posting all hooks on her blog, along with whether it hooks her. People who succeed get to send first pages (up to 750 words) for further comment.

So far she's been giving lots of comments on the hooks, but I'm sure that by the time she gets to mine (there are perhaps 500 people ahead of me in queue), she'll only be saying "yes" or "no".

Yes, I'm sending in for Mysterious Paris again, but my new hook is completely rewritten, and my first pages are a different scene.
Your opinion welcome. Please leave a comment.



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